Fabio's car-boot sale England squad makes puzzling reading. Bit light in midfield too.
England's forthcoming friendly fixture against reigning World Cup holders Spain should be a good barometer of the shape Fabio Capello's England are really in having qualified in hiccuping style, but with relative ease, for next year's European Championships.
How much are we really going to learn though, about England's position relative to Spain's strenth, from the 25 players called up for the coming international?
It is difficult, from the outside looking in, to make any sort of sense of the squad that Mr Capello has assembled, which seems a halfway house for various form players, future prospects and reliable old hands. There are a couple of questionable picks in there too.
We should get the John Terry business out of the way first, the ongoing investigations into the Chelsea skipper's conduct being the headline news of recent times.
Whether Terry did or did not racially abuse Anton Ferdinand- fellow pro, fellow paid-up member of the centre-half club and brother of his long-time international team-mate (one would really, really hope he did not)- the fact is that he is currently the subject of police and FA investigations, and Capello could very easily have dropped him for these non-competitive fixtures.
I think he'd have done everyone a favour. To drop Terry is not to pre-judge him; there is precedent for omitting players with potential charges hanging over them, with Rio Ferdinand left out prior to a disciplinary decision following his missed drug test.
If Terry is found guilty, that is definitely the end of his England career. His position in that respect would be untenable, no player with something that egregiously unnecessary and unpleasant on his CV could have any place in the national team. If he is not guilty, then jolly good and we carry on, but for only another couple of years at best.
So why not leave him out, give the whole thing the space it needs to be formally sorted out, and test out a new defensive partnership? Fellow Lancastrians Phil Jones and Gary Cahill, Phil Jagielka and Joleon Lescott reunited; they sound okay, right?
The omission of JT would have also created a space that might properly have been filled by this season's most impressive right full back, Manchester City's Micah Richards.
Capello has never fancied Richards, opting to play spindly centre-backs out of position or throw inexperience to the the lions rather than pick the City man, but to omit him on this season's evidence, with such an overwhelming deficiency of plausible alternatives is bafflingly stubborn and one-eyed.
- No England shirt for Richards
Richards, the stats would suggest, is the best full back in the Premier League, of any nationality, both in defence and going forward, helping his dominant City team to the top of the division. With 4 assists Richards is among the top 5 goal-suppliers, his completed passing average is exemplary, and he is, to coin a phrase, one the EPL's most tacklesome players.
It is not often that you find yourself agreeing with Joey Barton, but he is right to exasperatedly point out (on his Twitter feed) that of all City's stellar performers in their demolition of Manchester rivals United, it was Richards who came away as Man of the Match, shackling, in Ashley Young and Nani, one of the most devastating and fluid wing pairings in the world at the moment.
You cannot deny the evidence of your own eyes, though Capello has contrived here to do so. At the peak of his form and fitness, Richards is a better full back than Glen Johnson, a man who has proven himself short at the top level and who is struggling for fitness, and he is currently a better defender than the slightly flimsy, though undeniably talented, Kyle Walker. He can also play at centre-back, should you select Ledley King for a major championships and the need inevitably arise.
It is as staggering and inscrutable a bit of selection as I can think of, akin to my simply forgetting about a star player on Football Manager and having to try and justify it to a puzzled AI press cordon.
The forwards are a simpler proposition. In the absence of Wayne Rooney, Darren Bent is guaranteed a start, and seems to be in pole position to retain his central striker berth for Euro 2012 should his knees remain uncricked and his goal-poaching instincts sharp.
- Bent, Young and Agbonlahor could reunite for England1
Having reasonably jettisoned the truculent United striker, to explore other options in light of Rooney's probable absence from the opening stages next year in Poland and Ukraine, Capello looks set to play a Jose Mourinho-style 4-3-3/4-5-1 formation, hence the glut of slippery winger-cum-strikers in this squad.
Adam Johnson, Downing, Welbeck, Young, Agbonlahor and Daniel Sturridge, called up along with Jack Rodwell from the under-21s, will fight it out in training this week in an attempt to force their way into the starting XI. It's a young and exciting selection, hinting at the promise of England's future. None are proven goal-grabbers and match-throttlers, but all have the ability to stretch teams on the break and to provide from wide areas.
Less easy to square is the selection of Bobby Zamora. A good player in his own right and, left-footed, a rare commodity, Zamora is not long fully fit and has been playing second-fiddle this term to team-mate Andy Johnson.
The same age as Zamora (30), Johnson has scrapped his way back from a nasty spate of injuries that threatened to blunt his goal-scoring edge permanently, and now looks back to his deadly best. Ever a willing runner, with enough pace to worry any defender over 10 yards, Johnson has this season added to his repertoire of clinical finishes a knack for the spectacular, scoring a handful of goals that, scored by Wayne Rooney or David Silva, would have had pundits waxing sycophantic and making an early entry in their goal-of-the-season notebooks.
Anyway, I'd have picked Johnson over Zamora, and I might have sacrificed one of the host of hybrid-forwards for another proven high-calibre goal-scorer, in the overlooked form of Jermaine Defoe.
As a final thought, do you think this England squad looks a bit light in central midfield, Spain's area of special strength? Capello has, after all, chosen only four players to fill these key positions. It's all a bit odd, isn't it?
England Squad to face Spain & Sweden:
- Joe Hart (Man City)
- Scott Carson (Bursaspor)
- David Stockdale (Ipswich)
- Glen Johnson (Liverpool)
- Phil Jones (Man Utd)
- Gary Cahill (Bolton)
- John Terry (Chelsea)
- Ashley Cole (Chelsea)
- Leighton Baines (Everton)
- Phil Jagielka (Everton)
- Joleon Lescott (Man City)
- Kyle Walker (Tottenham)
- Frank Lampard (Chelsea)
- Jack Rodwell (Everton)
- Stewart Downing (Liverpool)
- Gareth Barry (Man City)
- Adam Johnson (Man City)
- James Milner (Man City)
- Scott Parker (Tottenham)
- Theo Walcott (Arsenal)
- Darren Bent (Aston Villa)
- Daniel Sturridge (Chelsea)
- Gabriel Agbonlahor (Aston Villa)
- Bobby Zamora (Fulham)
- Danny Welbeck (Man Utd)
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Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
Category Sport |
Synopsis: Fresh out of college, would-be-author Skeeter Phelan risks scandal and ostracism when she sets to work on a book of stories based on secret interviews with the black maids who serve the white families in a conservative Mississippi town.
Set in 1960s small town Mississippi, at the time of the Kennedy administration and American civil rights movement, Tate Tyler's adaptation of Kathryn Stockett's best-selling novel, The Help
, inevitably deals with challenging issues of race and institutional prejudice and the turbulence of a changing nation, part of which is actively resisting that change.
For all that, The Help handles heavy issues with a light touch. Clearly the exploitation and segregation of black domestic workers, particularly South of the Mason-Dixon line is a ugly, troublesome issue, and a part of America's past with which it engages reluctantly, but Tate – who directs from his own script – chooses here to allow the racial and social theme to serve the story and the characters, rather than the other way round.
The Help is funny and touching, filled with slapstick and tomfoolery, quiet anger and resignation, heartache and heartbreaks that will knot your throat and sting your eyes repeatedly, before breaking the tension with some precise sass or a pratfall.
This gentle grasp of the issues has not pleased everyone of course; the lack of tub-thumping anger and the use of broad comedy strokes have drawn criticism of a lack of engagement, and the inevitable questioning of how proper it is for white film-makers to use the struggles of black characters to tell their stories.
Is The Help exploitative in mining a difficult time in black history for a light-hearted melodrama? I don't think so. If the bigger picture is evaded, or merely alluded to, it is so Tate can tell the story of a sad, scared, tightly-wound little white town, and the story of a very particular moment therein; the back-street birth of change and reform.
Witty and warm despite a bleak and rather upsetting premise, The Help is not without a few (forgiveable) flaws. Mostly assured in its manipulation of its audience – from the edge of tears, to exasperation, to elation – The Help hits the odd bump along the way.
Straying occasionally into the mawkish sentiment and caricature which might mark this as another empowering 'woman's film', via fuzzy-edged flashbacks or belief-stretching set-pieces, The Help is held aloft by the performance of its strong cast of female leads, who put flesh on the bones of characters that could have been mere cyphers and symbols in less competent hands.
- A strong female cast, led by Emma Stone and Viola Davis, power The Help
Emma Stone plays the film's central figure Skeeter, who, raised by a black maid and repulsed by the treatment of and attitude towards 'the help' from a new generation of privileged white girls – her get-married-and-have-babies contemporaries - takes it upon herself to compile the untold stories of these voiceless women.
Stone is excellent. Her portrayal of Skeeter is as breezy as you'd expect of an actress predominantly associated with comic turns, but Stone also proves herself capable of pulling off the wide-eyed indignation and raw anger required here. The most modern character in The Help (perhaps, slightly anachronistically so), she is our eyes and ears. She is our sense of outrage and contempt for this grubby period and its people.
She's more than that though. Stone copes well with a silly wig, and rounds off the rough edges that crudely mark Skeeter out as a strong, rebellious, independent figure. Despite her role in the movie as a catalyst for change, and a propulsive force, Stone moves Skeeter into three dimensions.
She shares top billing with Viola Davis, who stars as Aibileen Clarke, a veteran maid in the town, stung by the treatment of herself and her friends, and by the race-related death of her son, into writerly collaboration with the ambitious Skeeter.
Davis is a revelation. Her Aibileen is an ocean of strength and dignity and Davis' presence radiates magnificently from the screen. The power of her performance, alongside Stone's exceptional turn, actually unbalances the film a little. The Help wobbles from protagonist to protagonist, attemting to condense a whole multifarious novel into cinematic form, unsure about whose story it wants to tell.
Davis by and large makes that decision for the audience; bowed but not cowed by years of hard-work, by the tragedy of raising white children that will grow up to fear and revile her while her own boy dies, Davis manages to make Aibileen more than a stereotype of oppression and uprising. She is full of love, maternal and sororal, and both fear and pride, and it's all there in the slump of her shoulders or the cast of her eye. It really is a brilliant performance.
There are fine supporting turns too from Bryce Dallas Howard (icily villainous as the arch-racist queen of suburbia Hilly), Jessica Chastain as the loveable, happily unprejudiced airhead Celia Foote, and from Octavia Spencer as Minny. Spencer gets the film's best, most outrageous moment when her Minny, sharp-tongued maid and foil to Aibileen's stoicism, does the “terrible awful”. Any lack of subtlety in the script is more than compensated for by a raft of engaged and deft performances by actresses at the top of their game.
A film full of heart and life, enough to make you forgive its mistakes and missteps, The Help is riveting in its story-telling and authentic in its period detail. Probably the most potent and affecting of all of this year's mainstream hits.
Our Rating: 
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Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
Category TV and Film |
"Hello," I thought, spotting a tempting and tangy treat on the shelf of my local Tesco Express. "Wait," I thought, surprised to be having another so soon, "Did I say that aloud?"
I certainly wasn't going to wait to find out. I scooped up my reduced-price bounty, being a pack of 4 Pork Farms mini pork pies topped with Branston Pickle, and whipped through the self service checkout with only the minimum required amount of frustrated swearing.
Sweaty with panic and excitement, I tore into the green pinstripe (!) packaging, to reveal my pork quatrain, housed in a flippy-lid lunchbox thing made of flimsy thermoplastic. I would eat as I walked; the consumption of pies being easily accommodated into one's stride, as a rule.
The pies did not make a good first impression. A fat blob of dark Branston brand pickle was dobbed sloppily on top of each of the pies, giving them the look of evil, bubbling vol-au-vents. The combination of the supportive, protective packaging and the loose generosity of the pickle portion made the short journey from pie-sheath to mouth a messy business. I found my hands stickily besmirched and the corners of my mouth similarly tainted.
The recessed flat top of the pie was stained a deep brown, and had become damp and soft, but not soggy.
And what of the taste? How sweet the duet or how bloody the battle when these two poet warriors, Branston Pickle and mini pork pie, met?
The Branston acquitted itself well as a sweet, tart and sharp welcome party. After the punch of the pickle, the pie itself was disappointing. The pastry was bland and doughy and the meat filling an underseasoned oyster of stodge. I was left with a slightly sick and greasy feeling after my brief, shameful dalliance with this gussied up meat tart.
The Pork Farms pie with Branston pickle unfortunately pales in comparison with a near competitor, Waitrose Pork & Pickle Pies.
The Waitrose product conceals its (unbranded) pickle surprise beneath a crust, which makes it much easier and neater to eat. Said crust is dotted with delicious seeds and its pastry and filling are just a lot lighter and more delicate.
At £1.49 for 4 the Pork Farm product has the edge on value, thrusting a hairy, tattooed arm across the face of the daintier, £1.39 for 2, Waitrose pies. I know which I'd rather though.
Price: £1.49 for 4
Try: Waitrose 2 Pork & Pickle Pies (£1.39 for 2)
Our Rating:
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Rating: 4.0/5 (1 vote cast)
Category Food and Drink |
After months using Schwarzkopf Live Colour XXL 
hair colourants in varying shades of vibrant (and often violent) red, I fancied a change. I made the switch to L'Oreal Feria 3D Hair Color
in mango intense copper.
Before I continue with my L’Oreal Feria review, I should say that I have naturally dark hair, which always makes the application of brighter and lighter shades a bit tricky. So, how did it fare?
First of all, the application process. Unlike other colourants, you apply this product when your hair is wet. This is actually much easier, as rather than splashing it around your head, you simply massage it in like a shampoo and work up a lovely lather. Also, it was a nice change not to find myself choking on acrid fumes.
A problem I have experienced with previous dyes is how long it takes to wash out after first application, as you aren’t supposed to be finished until the water runs clear. I have spent nearly an hour in the shower waiting for this to happen, with endless red colour streaming from my hair and turning the bathroom into something resembling a grisly murder scene.
This doesn’t happen with L’Oreal Feria, as it took just a bit longer than a normal hair wash to get all of the colour out. There was also no problem with the colour bleeding in subsequent washes, so you can take baths and even go swimming without turning the water a different colour.
So, after a smooth and easy application, what did the colour look like? It was as vibrant, multi-faceted and healthy-looking as it looked on the box, even with my dark hair. The colour did fade after a few weeks, but this is to be expected with darker hair colours. In fact, when I did feel the need to dye my hair again, it was because of my roots growing out rather than the colour fading.
In short, L’Oreal Feria hair colour is much easier to use than other colourants, and it delivers relatively long-lasting colour that actually resembles the shade on the box.
Our Rating:
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Rating: 5.0/5 (1 vote cast)
Category Health and Beauty, Shopping |
It's Cholula's turn in our Hot Spot (apologies if we've stolen that by the way), and what a rich, herby turn it is. It just isn't very hot unfortunately. Not sure what to make of that, are you?
Not very hot, even in a generous measure, Cholula Original Hot Sauce is nonetheless classy and tasty. It has no business calling itself a hot sauce though.
With a flavour like a concentrated shot of the tomato sauce from your own homemade chilli con carne, Cholula is a milder option, thinner than the majority of hot sauces, with greater focus on tickling your tastebuds than on eviscerating them.
You could happily stick a bottle of Cholula original on the table and use it like an everyday condiment without overpowering either little apple-cheeked children or saggy-faced grandparents. It likely lacks the bite and pop to impress your friends however, and real hot sauce enthusiasts will scoff at you. In your own home.
Filled with a blend of peppers, chile arbol and secret spices, a bottle of Cholula looks the part, rustically wooden-topped and hinting at Mexican authenticity. It's good, in its own way, and would make a fine part of a Justice League-style team of hot sauce super-heroes (doing something administrative, probably) but if you had to choose only one hot sauce for the rest of your days (you don't, I don't have that kind of authority, yet) it would not be this one.
Glug test: We're serious about our hot sauce reviews so we put our health, and the sanctity of our bathrooms, on the line by taking a stiff whomp from the bottle, for an immersive HD chilli experience.
Cholula fares okay. It does, imbibed unadulterated and in enough quantities, burn the tongue but not hard. A good big gulp of Cholula hot sauce hurt about as much as a dribble or drop from another peppier brand, and tasted a bit like a Bloody Mary, which is all very underwhelming.
Price: £1.22 for 150ml (Asda, similar in Tesco, Waitrose)
Our Rating: 
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Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)
Category Food and Drink |
